A certain Man Prepared A meal.

Who would in the widest of his imaginations forget even after series of reminders that he was to be the Chairman of an occasion? What would be the justification for there to be no persons, family relations and friends who attended this occasion?

Here I am to reflect on one of the rampart cases of what I would like to call cultural enslavement: the Umuada Saga. I am not here to prescribe or proscribe, nor am I here to condemn or praise, I am here to open the eyes of many.

I would like to substantiate with this real life story. A certain lady was about to wed, and 'omnia parata sunt' (Everything having been prepared), they got a message that the Umuada would not be coming because the mother was not a member. They went on to state that no Nwada has the right to go, with an explicit condition of ostracism as a deterring punishment for any offender. Now, on the day of wedding, no one of the Umuadas showed up, even the Umuadas who had blood relations with the bride; what a shame!

My first reaction to this was that of complete resentment marked with anger and embroiled in pity for the irrationality of some of our actions. Given that the Umuada has got what they wanted, what if the friends and family members of the bride, who had no problem with the bride but could not come just because they were told not to? Do you think the bride and the bride's family would take it as a mere joke? Of course not! The Umuada succeeded in dividing the family, putting one against the other. I then remembered the biblical story of the certain man who prepared a meal for invited guests only for them to fail to show up.

Now, would they have been invited, their coming would have no benefits intra mentally and extramenatally for the bride and family. They would have produced a list of what and what must be given to them, without any consideration as to the financial state of the person celebrating or who invited them. Cartons of soap, detergents, crates and cartons of malt and drinks, beer and a host of other things, and you must provide all these things with the exemption of NONE!

The manner with which they would scrutinize the things brought while cross checking with their 'list' makes one wonder why they would not be heads of the Bureau of Public Procurement (BPP). A small omission of a bottle of fanta, then, the whole place would be set on fire!

Most of them would come with six empty bottles of different drinks with which they would exchange drinks. Then, also, bags for carting Rice and other edibles. At the end of the day, majority of them would not present any gift to the bride and her groom! What do we call this?

I'm not from the school of traditionalism as much as I have no penchant for changism, but I do believe that time has come for us to apply reason in scrutinizing some of these practices we hold so dear. These cultures were developed by man for man's use and as such, they should not be treated as ends in themselves, but as means to an end.

                      Cally Ifedi
                      27-08-2014
                      Benin-city